Tuesday, December 11, 2018

Annual Christmas Letter 2018


2018 …
Happy December 2018!  Almost 2019.  That means our kids are even older and, shockingly, so are we.  A few highlights to share include: 
·         Officially decided to not leave California…for maybe a few years
·         Kelly started doing “extreme hiking.”  Todd just calls this “walking.”  Are 8-23 mile day hikes extreme?  You decide.
·         Amanda has continued her studies in Forestry, and somehow has managed to (for the most part) avoid actual forests. 
·         Julia was not accepted into the engineering program at Long Beach.  This is good because she actually applied to the nursing program. 
·         Allison has decided to possibly seek out the swashbuckling life of an accountant.
·         After finally surpassing his oldest sister, Matthew is now currently ranked 5th in the Linskey Family height competition.                                                  
                                                                                                                                                

Amanda – College Senior (Cal Poly SLO - Forestry w/Wildlife Biology Concentration)
Spent a few months at the Southwest Research Station in Arizona.  She got to visit New Mexico (AGAIN!)  Possibly because she got lost.
Should never fall back on being a manicurist as a second career.
Her weapon of choice is an axe.  If she is ever attacked by a tree, this might be useful.
Cited “fear of hiking” as her number one reason for staying in college. 
Discovered that you should never, ever buy “Gourmet Italian Lunchables” from the 99¢ store.   

Julia – College Sophomore (CSU–Long Beach – Nursing)
After swearing she’d never do chemistry again, she now teaches it.  Be thankful she’s not teaching anyone Geography or “the maths.”
Started her nursing career off by giving dad a flu shot.  Dad spared Matthew irreversible PTSD when he resisted his urge to shriek.
Made the following comment: “When I swim with fins, I go slow … faster.”
When bored one day, she calculated what her weight would be if the measure of weight was based on squirrels (115 squirrels = 1 Julia)
“I feel like the Millennial CEO of a hipster coffee company.”  (Julia’s comment regarding her “look” before her nursing interview)

Allison – High School Senior (And counting the days until graduation…)   
Made it a year without an injury.  Or catching some new and exciting 19th century illness. 
She is the human version of Eeyore.  She might even get a tattoo of it.  Eeyore truly is the embodiment of Princess Grumpy Pants.
Milestones of the year include watching every episode of Brooklyn 99, The Office, and every Fail Army video ever made.. 
Can eat an entire pan of enchiladas by herself and may injure you if you try to take one.  You think I’m kidding. Try it.  I dare you.
Her most exciting triumph of the year was discovering sloth-themed wrapping paper.

Matthew – Catholic Middle School 8th Grader
Has also taken up hiking.  When he’s forced to.  (Or as he puts it, “I hate it when you come up with bribes I can’t say no to.”)
“I’m on my own server destroying stuff.  Allison is building low-income housing.” (Matthew describing Allison’s lack of Minecraft skills).
When bored, Matthew steals mom’s phone and sends selfies of himself with a moustache exclaiming, “I’m Ron Swanson!” (see photo).
Weighs approximately 91 squirrels.
Binge-watched “The Great British Baking Show” so much that he wanted to try his hand at some of their recipes…and quickly discovered
   why there are no English Restaurants.

Bucky – age 11 ½ - “Bumpasaurus”
Has added wood bridges and weed whackers to his list of “things that MUST be barked at.”
Discovered that his spirit animal is a large outdoor plant.
Solidified his “grumpy old man” dog status by groaning every single time he sits down.  Or gets up. Or, really, moves at all.
Was introduced to “gnat water,”  a mysteriously refreshing and robust potpourri of water, bugs, and possibly cholera.
Has added “things next to garbage cans,” “things next to children,” and “things in anyone’s pocket” to his list of “foods that MUST be tried.”

 “A realistic approach to life coupled with optimism and a sprinkle of humility is truly the recipe for happiness.”

Have and a safe and happy 2019!

Todd, Kelly, Amanda, Julia, Allison, Matthew and Bucky

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