Mom's nuts ...and other ramblings

Okay, we have another lesson. This time, it comes from mom. Yes, you read that right.

Lesson #434: Do not be lazy and decide to "incinerate" all the leftover gunk in the grill by turning it on full-blast when said grill has the equivalent of a gallon of grease coating its inside. Propane+"gunk"+grease+crazy-from-trying-to-sell-house-mom=FIRE. Fire bad.

This was pretty much my thought process leading up to the fire:
Hmmmm...gunk on grill. Gunk icky. Fire burn gunk. Hmmmmm...that weird! Why grill smoke? Ohh - grill on fire. Fire bad. Uhh-ohh.....

The hose was too far away (plus, the sprinkler is welded to the end of it - we think from Bucky chewing on it in one of his more bored moments). Picture me wrestling with a sprinkler trying to put out a flaming gas grill. A kodak moment if there ever was one. But, no, I didn't do that. I just turned off the burners, turned off the propane tank, got a few buckets of water from the sink and doused some of the heat before quickly disconnecting the half-full tank and moving it away from the heat. Bucky, ever the helpful dog, was nice enough to lick all the gunk off the tank for me (ummmmmmm-good!) I put out the rest of the flames, disassmbled the grill, cleaned it, put it back together, and successfully cooked my chicken 2 hours later than I'd originally planned to cook it.

My mental status has been quite questionable lately. I shut the car door on Bucky's tail a few days ago (well, in my defense, he watched it shut on his tail while I was trying to get him to move). He has since been quite hesitant to go in the car (which could be good for his weight loss plan because the car floor usually accounts for about about 30% of his daily caloric intake courtesy of my children who can't eat without making a mess). I also ran over a snake cutting the grass and have managed to recieve several interesting burns, bruises, and other injuries from cleaning way too much. How? Well, did you know that kicking a lawn mower hurts (or burns, depending on where you aim) and really DOESN'T make it start any faster? The same can be said of a vacuum cleaner that starts eating a piece of clothing shoved under a bed instead of being put in the hamper. I may be turning to mental epidurals soon (if I actually kept alcohol in the house, this would be a lot easier). On the bright side, my house is really clean. And, my yard is in great shape (especially with all the natural snake carcass fertilizer).