New Rules for Solitaire!

You think you know how to play solitaire? Try playing with Matthew. He's really helpful, and has all sorts of helpful tips that will make your game interesting. For example, he will point out which cards are "wrong". Face cards are wrong, Jokers are wrong. He will remove all the black cards from your deck because he only likes the red cards (but, only the red number cards because the face cards, even the RED face cards, are just "wrong"). And by remove I mean he will pick them up from in front of you and won't give them back. Cathy took her game to a new level of difficulty with Matthew helping her out.

Lesson # 428: Never play Solitaire with a 4-year old. Just give them some scissors to run with, ply them with candy, or give them their own deck (if you are lucky enough to have a spare). You could try playing in the bathroom, but even that probably wouldn't work. Lesson #47 taught us that. To refresh your memory...

Lesson #47: "If you are in the bathroom, you must be doing something completely interesting and exciting that demands observation and attention by anyone in the house under the age of 10. This includes your children, your children's friends, your pets, random neighbor pets, and anyone else who might be passing on the street." Lesson #47 also applies to when you are in the shower.

5-hour rule?

Some people believe in the 5 second rule. Some people think there's a 5 minute rule. But, in Matthew's world, he has a trick that makes food good no matter how long it has been on the floor.

Lesson # 427: If you blow on it, it doesn't matter how long a piece of food has been on the floor because that will make it okay to eat. It will no longer be dirty if you blow on it. So don't throw it away, blow on it.

(The following lesson was demonstrated to us when, while eating Fruit Loops one morning for quite a long time, Matthew noticed that there was some that had fallen to the floor. Cathy picked it up and put it on the counter. I picked it up to throw it away. Matthew looked at me and sternly said, "No, it's not dirty. Blow on it." And he was quite serious. And, after blowing on it, he took it out of my hand and ate it!)

Our 2008 Summer Trip (a.k.a "Who goes on a 1-month road trip? That's nuts!")

So, we started our trip by going to Iowa to visit with Grandma Irma, go to Aunt Jenny's wedding, and visit with all our cousins, aunts, uncles, and anyone else we could assault. That was followed by our arrival in Wisconsin to visit with Grandpa Terry & Grandma Jo, and Grandma Mary and Uncle Kevin, and Uncle Brian & Aunt Tarra, and every other cousin and extended relative who couldn't hide from us. Next, we headed east to Ocean City, New Jersey to spend a week with "Cousin" Cathy and Great Uncle Tom. It was, "Awesome, even if we did get sand in our butts!" according to the kids. We took the Cape May ferry and drove to Washington DC to meet Micah, the new son of Julia's godparents Niki and Dan (according to Julia, "Now I have a god-brother! That's so cool!") Matthew spent the night terrorizing Dan and Niki's neighbors by riding Talya's bike in his underwear. Dan got him back (see picture). The next day, we drove to Monticello and then took a scenic drive on the famed "Blue Ridge Parkway" (motto - "We can triple your travel time!"). It was actually very nice. We arrived home the next day, exactly 1 month and 1 day after leaving.

Remind me next year to take a shorter trip. Although, if we're moving, that alone will be our summer trip!

Back in Georgia

We're back home. Actually, we got back Sunday. But, I was pretty tired. I think that's the longest trip we've taken - over 1 month. The kids were ecstatic to be back in their beds. Bucky has been such a good dog the last few days - I think he actually missed us for those two weeks we were away from him.

I'll upload the pictures from the trip in the next few days. We went from Iowa to Wisconsin to New Jersey to Washington DC to Monticello and the Blue Ridge Parkway and then finally home to Georgia. Did you know the speed limit is only 45 on the Blue Ridge Parkway (we drove about 115 miles on it) and that it's so windy you mostly go about 30 if you are lucky and don't have a bunch of people in front of you stopping in the middle of the road to stare in awe when they could more easily pull into the scenice bypass to stare in awe??? That actually only happened about 4 times, but (seriously) stopping in the middle of the road??? Who does that when there isn't a deer or moose threatening suicide when there are clearly marked pullouts 20 feet ahead that actually have a better view? Incidentally, it's probably a fantastic route for motorcylists to take (there were at least 10 times as many cycles on that road as there were cars). Our camera battery died at Monticello so I think I might only have one picture from that and none of the Blue Ridge Parkway. But, it's pretty (and effectively triples your travel time).

The real "news" of the week is that we may be moving again next summer. Yes, we actually have time to plan it (or, more specifically, a deadline to finish our house projects). Todd was selected for a job running a NOSC (Navy Operational Support Center, or something like that) up in Rochester, New York. So, if anyone has any knowlege of Rochester or has lived there, we'd love to hear from you because (like everywhere else we've ever lived) we know nothing about it.

Have a great week :)

Wisconsin...and some sad news :(

We're now in Wisconsin! We have pictures, but I can't post them quite yet.

This post is mostly about some sad news - our aunt Nancy passed away on Thursday morning at the age of 74. Grandma Mary was with her at the end, and we were actually on our way to visit her when we learned that she was slipping away. The funeral was yesterday, which was coincidentally our 12th anniversary. It was a nice, simple service and (as Allison said) "She's in heaven now and will be happy with Jesus."

We'll be here for a few more days until we head out to the New Jersey shore for a week of lying around on the beach. I'll need it after the drive! Then again, since the kids will most likely be trying to find new places to hide sand in their respective orifices and/or drown themselves I guess I won't really be lying around ...

Awesome, Spectacular, Fun IOWA!!!

Those are the words used to describe Iowa. We drove up a few days ago and have been enjoying our time. According to Amanda, "If you want to go somewhere boring, Iowa is NOT the place to go."

On the way up, we saw 4 car accidents (one fatal) and had a trailer blow a tire next to us. According to Allison, "It was the worst day of my life!" Amanda quickly pointed out that the guy who died probably had the worst day of his life, not her. We also saw some pretty severe flooding. The worst was around Quincy, IL (we drove on the Missouri side). The road we traveled on was sandbagged to hold water back...and this was several miles from the river. We also drove through Cedar Rapids. The debris and damage was astonishing. But, everyone in town was out cleaning up. That's the midwest for you. There was flood damage in so many places here - there will be a lot of cleaning up and rebuilding.

In a few days we get to go to Aunt Jenny's wedding. The kids, however, were more excited to learn that the movie "Wall-E" is going to be in town on Friday. Matthew has been busy telling everyone this, including Bucky, the backyard trees, the swingset, and any random person that walks by. But, the really big reason why Friday is going to be "the best" is that all 10 cousins will be together again.

So, that's what we're up to now. We're off to walk to the library and then go through town. You can do this so easily here in Iowa. It's safe, it's friendly, it's just a nice place to be :)

Ohh my heaven, look who's 7!!!

It's hard to believe that 7 years ago we were living in Japan and were surprised by the early arrival of little Allison (for those who may have forgotten, the little stinker wasn't due until July!) It's hard to believe she's going into second grade too!

Rather than repeat the horror of the consecutive sleepover weekend of a month ago (Bucky is still recovering from the hearing loss), we opted to have a "Dinner and Movie" party. We had ushers and concession workers (Amanda, Julia, and Bobbi Ann) to guide the guests in, get them some candy and popcorn, and see them to their seats (in the living room). We had the "annoying child in the audience who keeps blocking the screen" (played by Matthew). We even had an intermission (pizza). The movie shown was Ferngully (it was old enough that nobody had seen it). Most everyone liked it, so that was good (a few parts were a little 'scary' for two guests). We had ice cream cake and then proceeded to destroy a pinata. And that all took 2 hours! It went fast, she got a bunch of stuff she really loved, and she's even written out all her thank you cards. Thanks again to everyone who made her day a great one :)

Smiley faces make everything okay :)

Today's lesson is more of a guideline to living in the world of Matthew.

Lesson #426: If you have a smiley face, not matter what you do everything is good and happy.

So, that means if you (for example) hit your sister or throw a fit or draw on the wall you are not in trouble IF you have a smiley face.

When Matthew did something yesterday that I considered naughty, I said to him, "Matthew, you're being bad." He responded with, "No, I not. I have a smiley face." He got in front of me and demonstrated that he did, in fact, have a smiley face. When I asked him to show me his angry face, it looked more like a constipated face. But, his smiley face is cute. It's hard to stay mad when they come up with such cute excuses.

The First Swim Meet

Last night was the first swim meet of the year. Because the water outside hasn't been exceedingly warm (water temps in the low 70s - which for pools is a bit chilly...most indoor pools are about 84 degrees in comparison), there haven't been too many practices. Those that we have had have not lasted very long (can you get hypothermia twice in a week?) So, most of the swimmers are a bit rusty.

Amanda has the best starts. She actually dives in. Hands entering first, head down, feet going in last. Julia jumps out...and enters either feet first or spread eagle. Allison enters the same way, only she also plugs her nose before entering the water. BUT, as bad as this sounds it seems to be the preferred method among a large percentage of the competitors.

So, each girl swam 3 races. Amanda, becuase she's moved up to the older division, has to swim 50's (2 laps) instead of the 25's she swam last year. She hung in there and managed to crank out freestyle, backstroke, and breaststroke. Julia had the meet of her life (so far). She finished first in each of her races (well, she didn't finish first for her leg of the relay, but the relay team did win). Allison also had a great time. Did I mention she smiles while she's racing? That's not usually what you expect to see - but I think I got a picture of it.

We have a meet every week until we go on my "departure from sanity" (a.k.a. - the summer road trip).

(I threw in a picture of Matthew from Memorial Day - just because he HAD to wear that outfit. What you don't see is him falling on his face moments after putting on the goggles because they essentially make him blind. BUT, according to him, they are needed to "Keep my eyeses warm.")

Last Day of School

Okay, this is a little late - but here are a few pictures from the last day of school. Allison passed out about an hour after getting home (I guess the silly string has other side effects we weren't aware of). Matthew, fearing the noise from the thunderstorm, put on his extra "ears". He then fell asleep wearing them.

Happy Summer! I know, it's really early to get out. That's just not fair, right? Well, think about this: We go BACK to school August 10th. In Atlanta, it is almost as hot as the surface of the sun in August. Would it make more sense to make the year last a little longer in June? Of course! But, then again, sane people don't ever make the important decisions...

The Last Lap...

The tradition at Timber Ridge Elementary is for the 5th graders to take a few laps around the track at the end of their last day of school. All of the other grades, from Pre-K through 4th grade, line the track. The 5th graders come out last and do their "run" around the track and give and receive congratulatory high-fives to everyone lining the track. They made 4 laps around the track (those last few were more walking than running). Only one boy had to be chased down by the gym teacher (but was actually finally caught by the music teacher!) Apparently, he wanted to stay ...

Amanda had some mixed feelings about leaving. After getting off the bus, she was a bit sad and said, "I never get to go there again." I then reminded her that she'll be there plenty of times next year with her 3 siblings who still attend school at Timber Ridge. She seemed quite relieved by that.

Above are a few pictures from the occasion!

Graduation Recognition

Huh? Yes, graduation for 5th graders. Hey, we don't plan it - we just show up and clap when we're told (sort of like Matthew). In a few years, we get to do it again with both Julia (another 5th grade graduation) and Matthew (kindergarten graduation). We'll have true anarchy when Amanda graduates from high school and Matthew from 5th grade (what if it's on the same night?!?)

Anyway, Tuesday night was "Graduation Recognition" night for the 5th Graders at Timber Ridge Elementary. This means that they do a presentation honoring the 5th graders. And, for a sizeable portion of the night we also honored the volunteers who helped with all the graduation-related activites for the 5th grade class. We also had 2 tornado warnings just to spice it up a bit. It was fun, once we went through 9 kids presenting their volunteer moms with flowers and gifts. And, of course, all 5th graders - especially the boys - dream of doing this in front of a few hundred people! In a 5th grade boy's world, co-ed square dancing in gym class is less painful than having to express anything towards his mom (especially in public!) Thankfully, 5th grade girls don't apparently suffer from this affliction ...yet.

It was fun, and only ran about an hour late. Here are a few pictures of Amanda and friends...

Who I Like

by Matthew Linskey

Matthew and I had a short, but interesting, conversation today.

It started with Matthew saying,
"I like Allison. She my sister. I like her."

I asked,
"Do you like Amanda and Julia?"

"No."

"Do you like Amanda?"

"Uh-uh. No."

"Why not?"

"No, Amanda's mad."

"Do you like Julia?"

"No."

"Is she mad too?"

"No, I like Allison."

"Do you like Daddy?"

"Daddy? No."

"Do you like mommy?"

(And in an innocent voice with a big smile, he answers) "Yes???"

Good answer!!!

I'm not sure why he "doesn't like" anyone but Allison, but they are buddies. He has a big grin on his face when saying this, so I suspect that it's all for laughs...imagine that!

Lesson #425

Lesson #425 - NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER EVER EVER EVER EVER EVER NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER EVER do a sleepover with more than 4 kids, or with more than 3 kids, or really with any kids if you can avoid it. Ohh, and don't do sleepovers on consecutive nights. Hire, blackmail, or bribe someone else to do it somewhere other than your house (where you will busy having your own sleepover!)

Did you know there is no actual sleep at a sleepover? It's mostly screaming, screeching, some crying, unnatural high pitched sounds that could rival waterboarding for torture, games that make no sense, and did I say there is no sleep? None whatsoever! Even the kids who say they're tired start doing things like belching uncontrollably or thinking of new ways to make unusual sounds with various body parts. There is writing on faces, writing on dogs, semi-nudity, terrorizing of the neighbors, terrorizing of the siblings, races around the house (with and without pets, with and without clothing), and general mayhem. Add to this the idiot parents (meaning Kelly) who supply mass quantities of sugar, carbs, and soda that puts the "sleepover" participants into a state of near manic derangement.

Both parties started at about 7pm and ended around 10am. The kids (3rd graders Friday, 5th graders Saturday) probably "went to bed" (which is code for "finally passed out") around 4am both nights. They started to "go to bed" at around midnight. We watched movies, ate cake and pizza and drank soda. There were chips and cookies and crackers and bubbles flying everywhere (and I mean everywhere - we found some in a tree outside). There was a pinata. We made tie-dyes, played sticker games and ball games, did makeovers, played outside, and someone had the idea to put others into "trances". At that point, we learned the true definition of DRAMA. DRAMA has to be in caps, because for some reason, there are actually groups of kids who categorize themselves (and will actually admit to being) overly dramatic - they are proud to be this way. Now, I will admit that I was not the friendliest of teenagers (my nickname was "piranha" - and I can laugh about it now). But, I don't think I was too big on the DRAMA (I was too busy being pissed off at all the stupid people!) We had some BIG DRAMA Saturday night. All I can say is that I'm terrified of the coming years. Terrified. The only thing I've ever been terrified by before was using the old outhouse up north (the new one, of course, is spectacular!)

I think there were two especially memorable quotes, both occurring on Saturday. The first was when I caught a group trying to "sled" down the stairs in their sleeping bags (see, we have two sets of staircases - this could have snowballed into ER visits!) After being told not to do that, that it was a bit too dangerous (and not a good example for Matthew who would certainly try it immediately), the young lady responded, "Well, you can't blame us for trying, right?" She had a point. The second quote is courtesy of Todd. After listening in on a DRAMAtic scene of some kind, he said, "Ok, listen up: Kelly was nice. I'm not nice. I have no qualms about calling your parents right now at 3am to have them come and pick you up. So, settle down and go to sleep. Good night." He's so smart - why didn't I think to threaten them with their parents! Ohh, wait, sleep deprivation clouded my judgement.

I got up early next morning (me, not Todd, who the first night hid in the basement and the second night pretended to be dead!) I got breakfast and drinks ready and had the pleasure of waking them all up. I was nice - I let them "sleep in" a little while. I'd have used Bucky, but he was passed out from exhaustion (and we think had some temporary hearing loss). Everyone seemed to have fun, so I guess the parties were a success. But, when Allison asks for a sleepover in a month I have a better idea: Dinner and movie night - NO SLEEPOVER! Now, why didn't I think of that before!

An interview with Matthew

Matthew's teachers asked him some questions the other day about mom and dad. Here a few of the questions and answers - they're quite interesting.

My daddy is 20 years old.

My daddy's favorite person is me.

My daddy's favorite food is hot dogs.

My daddy's favorite game is ball.

My daddy's favorite thing to do is computer.

My mommy is 33 years old.

Her favorite place to shop is at the store.

She likes to cook "scetties".

Her favorite person is the doctor.

her favorite thing to eat is hot dogs.

Her favorite game is driving cars.

Her favorite thing to do is paint a picture.

Who knew I was a cradle robber??? Or, I just look tired and old. Must be all the hot dogs...

Julia's (almost) big day!

Julia turned 9 today. She is feeling pretty old. She requested a cookie cake - mom actually was able to create it. It is gone. Matthew is mostly responsible for that. He is now bouncing off the walls and looks like he has a goatee (not a good look, incidentally).

Tomorrow night is the "big deal" sleepover party that ought to kill me... We'll have pictures, but I can't promise them before sometime next week (I anticipate a several-day recovery). Amanda's sleepover is Saturday night. Maybe it'll be a several week recovery.