2021 - "At least it was not 2020"

So, we got the vaccine, the kids (sort of) went back to school, and everytime we had a "huge party" we ended up with new variants and outbreaks.  Still, we managed to get through the year.  We are hoping the chip shortages end (along with all the other shortages) and are hoping next year we don't get backcountry permits cancelled again by wildfires.  Or earthquakes.  Or new variants.  

Let's just hope we get through the year!

Amanda – First-year student, EATM (Exotic Animal Training and Management) @ Moorpark College

She cleans the animals’ rooms more often than her own.

Learned the only thing worse than working in customer service during a pandemic is trying to buy a car during a pandemic.

Asked Todd, “Remember when we lived in New York and kept peasants in the freezer.”  

Is a self-proclaimed pretzel slut.

 

Julia –2021 Graduate - BSN (California State University - Long Beach), licensed RN

Graduated from ANGEL STADIUM and passed her nursing exams to become NURSE JULIA!!!

Ask her to sing HER VERSION of the song “Down Under” by Men at Work.

Still requires a crossing guard to keep her alive.

Quote:  “I wish we had juice, but all we have is alcohol.” 

 

Allison – College Junior (California State University Long Beach - Marine Biology)

Missed her doctors so much that she recently started rock climbing.

Is easily startled by bubble wrap.

Transferred to Long Beach to (yet again) copy her older sister.

Sometimes acts as a Long Beach crossing guard for her sister.

Discovered Matthew lacks self-preservation on their ill-fated 2-hour Joshua Tree camping trip.

 

Matthew – High School Junior (St Bonaventure High School)

Will text the phrase “Sad Matthew Noises” if you send him a text he does not appreciate or approve of.

In a bold culinary move, Matthew announced that after 17 years he has decided that he like eggs.

Did not listen to his sister Allison at Joshua Tree when she said, “Hey, maybe don’t jump off that rock.”

Was diagnosed with a non-fatal “boo-boo” by nurse Julia who bandaged the resulting “grievous injury.”

 

Bucky – age 14 ½ - Elder Dog, Answers to any name if you have food, “Wow! He’s still alive?”

Were shocked to learn Bucky had a biological reason for his excessive laziness (his thyroid quit working!)

The entire floor of the kitchen is the new number one item on his list of “Foods that must be tried.”

In his old age, we discovered he can only successfully enter a car butt first.

Has added his empty food bowl, any closed door, and boxes at the door to his list of “Things that must be barked at.” 

Happy Holidays – Happy New Year !

Todd, Kelly, Amanda, Julia, Allison, Matthew, and Bucky

2020 - The year we all became Vegas

 

(Everybody’s losing money, it’s acceptable to drink anytime, we’re rarely appropriately dressed, and nobody has any idea what day it is)

 

·         Amanda graduated …and we celebrated with a nice yard sign (that’s the same, right?)

·         Julia got to live the college dream of drinking with her parents on her 21^st birthday! 

·         Allison cannot appropriately express in words how thoroughly she is enjoying the academic splendor that is Zoom University.

·         Hiked almost enough to burn off the crazy caused by the pandemic.  Almost.

·         Matthew finally surpassed Julia and is now 2nd in the Linskey Family height competition (but he still won’t eat vegetables!)

Amanda – Cal Poly SLO 2020 Graduate (BS Forestry, Biology minor)

Before the forests were all on fire, they were closed because of Covid.  And then earthquakes.  So, nobody was hiring Forestry graduates. 

Forestry grads make excellent Vons grocery store deli clerks. 

“Like two children in the back of a minivan fighting over a bag of Cheetos.”  – Amanda’s review of the first Presidential debate

Working in the deli has inspired Amanda to apply to the renowned Exotic Animal and Training Management program at Moorpark College.

 

Julia – College Senior (CSU–Long Beach – Nursing)

Escaped the house to do zoom classes from an apartment in Long Beach and work at a smoothie shop.  She’s the most sane of us all now.

Learned that RuPaul is NOT a drag RACER. 

Admitted that she thought “Houston” was the guy astronauts called with their problems. 

“Leg elbow” – the phrase Julia uses when she forgets the easily forgotten technical term of “knee.”

“My entire childhood is summed up by the sound of a kickball hitting you on the side of the head.” -Julia’s comment on her graceful youth

 

Allison – College Sophomore (CSU Monterey Bay - Marine Science)   

Gets exhausted by taking naps.

Realized after 7 seasons of Letterkenny that it was based in Canada and NOT Ireland.

Might transfer schools, which still means classes in her fabulously appointed bedroom/potential Covid isolation room.

“Me: 0   Sesame: 2”  - Allison, after her second “incident” with her dietary archnemesis.  And, Kelly learned there is sesame in breadcrumbs.

 

Matthew – High School Sophomore (St. Bonaventure High School)

FINALLY got to take his drivers test…and passed with a better score than his sisters (and he reminds them every chance he gets).

“Matthew, if your toast isn’t darker than me then it’s not toast.” (Julia)

“I have to study the Holy Trilogy for my religion final.” – Matthew during spring final exams in his room

“Your honor, I disagree because that’s stupid.” – Allison impersonating Matthew if he were to become a lawyer

 

Bucky – age 13 ½ - “Wow, how old is your dog?”

Discovered he is a very jealous boy when he had to share the stage with a shunned and temporarily adopted cliff swallow named Reginald. 

Reginald was number one on his list of “foods that MUST be tried.”  He failed, but not for lack of trying.

“This dog has had more flavor in his lifetime than a Medieval English peasant.” (Julia)

Has added mechanical boxes and his own shadow to his list of “things that must be barked at.”

Has started wearing a light-up collar at night.  This is partly so he can be seen, and partly so he can fulfill his dream of being a disco dog.

We thankfully managed to get through 2020 with a few adventures, a lot of Netflix, sufficient toilet paper, and our sanity minimally intact.    Along with everyone else in the world (except maybe mask manufacturers and Zoom investors), we hope 2021 brings an effective vaccine, a return to school, something that resembles “normal,” and hopefully a HUGE party!  Happy New Year!  (It just has to be better than last year! )

 

 

 

 

 

Todd, Kelly, Amanda, Julia, Allison, Matthew and Bucky

2019 …

Happy December 2019!  Our kids are all in high school or college.  We forgot what we did most of the year due to our advancing age. But, here are a few things we think happened:

·         Experienced our first “for real” earthquakes over the summer.  And, of course, we had several more wildfires. 

·         If you need anything done with a chainsaw or texture gun, Todd is your man. 

·         Our hiking trips continued to both old and new destinations and featured several new and improved attempts at injury.

·         Julia tells us all about gross stuff she sees in her nursing life. Not sure if this is better than her previous obsession with dog videos. 

·         After one week, Allison ditched the dream of the swashbuckling life of an accountant for marine science. 

·         Matthew has surpassed mom and Allison and is now currently ranked 3rd in the Linskey Family height competition.

 

Amanda – College SUPER Senior (Cal Poly SLO - Forestry)

“Amanda ready”:  No shoes, maybe dressed, almost packed, usually 10-15 minutes from actually being ready.

Dispenses reassuring Forestry advice.  Example: “They look weird, but they are probably edible.”

Returned to Japan, discovered more anime, and stunned to learn that sumo wrestlers basically get that big eating only soup.

Answered the eternal question plaguing mankind:  Do cows roll or slide if they fall down a hill.  (It’s both).

Julia – College Junior (CSU–Long Beach – Nursing)

When asked what a philatelist collects, she hypothesized that it was someone who collects romance novels about “Phil.”

Learned there is no difference between a “Bruin” and a “Bear.” 

Drove home from school with her phone on top of the car.  Learned not to do that again.

Has serious trouble ordering cheesecake from the Cheesecake Factory. 

Freely admits that she has not been to a gym all year. 

Allison – College Freshmen (CSU Monterey Bay – Marine Science)   

Has actually been to the gym this year. 

Routinely stays up until 2 or 3 am and thinks this is normal. 

Texts in cavewoman.  May be related to the above fact. 

Tried to blow herself up lighting the grill to make Bratwurst. Apparently, it was worth it.  Priorities.

The rest of us are disappointed with her hatred of this Christmas letter.  Especially Bucky.

Matthew – High School Freshman (St. Bonaventure High School)

What I hate (by Matthew):  1) Hiking 2) Dryland 3) Vegetables 4) Unnecessary shopping 5) REI 6) Etc.

Has determined that the next Frozen sequel should include the song, “Keep It In.”

“Welcome to meeting me.” and “It’s lonely out here on crazy island” were both overheard from a brooding Matthew.

 “I don’t waste my life doing stuff for other people.”  (Matthew – in a moment of brutal honesty)

Renamed “cream cheese” to “cheese cream.”  This is a follow-up to his prior renaming triumph of “waffle sauce.”

Bucky – age 12 ½ - “Bumpasaurus”

After years of attacking bushes to relieve himself, one finally struck back and punctured his eye.  He has not learned from this mistake.

Dreams of becoming a “pirate dog.” 

Given the chance, he will eat an entire corn cob.  It is now number one on his list of “foods that MUST be tried.”

Can only take a bath in a kiddie pool (partly because he can’t go upstairs anymore, partly because he is afraid of water from a hose).

Has added “anything he THINKS he hears, even if it’s nothing” and tipped-over garbage cans to his list of “things that must be barked at.”

Often “fake shakes” (as if he is freezing) when forced to spend time outside in our brutal California (70 degrees and sunny) climate.

Have and a safe and happy 2020!  

Go Badgers/Packers/Mustangs/Dirtbags/Otters/Seraphs!

Todd, Kelly, Amanda, Julia, Allison, Matthew and Bucky